Wednesday, June 20, 2012


I found a beetle in my hair today. I had it done up all fugly in a topknot and when I took it down and ran my fingers through it, a metallic full-sized beetle fell out and scuttled away. Utterly horrific. I mean, it was probably relieved to finally escape, but seriously, how disgusting is that? How totally out of control of my life am I when I can't even stop relatively large insects from residing inside my hair? Fuck.

Like, it's hilarious that I've been moaning about how guys won't respect me when I'm pretty much on the same playing field as a spiderweb. When I get depressed about my career and money situation, all I need to do is remind myself that there are literally bugs chillin in my hair. So unprofessional. Reality check, noted.

I wish I could tie the beetle into what I want to say next but it would be a bit heavy handed to write "much like the bug living in my hair, my obsession with unavailable men lingers..." But anyway, the boy mentioned in my last post must've been summoned by the undead spirits of Blogspot because he ended up texting the next day and we made plans to finally see Moonrise Kingdom even though I assumed I would never hear from him again.

It would be nice if I could feign surprise or outrage at the fact that those plans never materialized but I'm pretty much numb to it now. Like, convicted murders have girlfriends and wives while on death row. Do I gotta catch a charge before I'm allowed to fall in love?  Anyways, he blew me off again and then asked me to hang out "next week" for the billionth time.

I started to feel like I was swallowing my pride each time I would respond to his texts or make efforts to see him again but it's actually my excess of pride that kept me going back for more abuse - my brain just refuses to believe that I could be rejected. *Cognitive Flare* They must be just be reallllly busy! Psh. You got bugs in your hair, girl.

Anyway, the last time I texted him I said "Sure, obviously I'm amazing at rainchecks!" and he got all indignant, which is rich considering the number of times he has straight up blew me off after I shaved my legs and made my bed and everything.

So, that is all to say...


No comments:

Post a Comment